Sunday, December 28, 2014

Episode 41: 'The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies'

Oh sweet sonoriety! Hope you all are enjoying the holidays. As for the J's, Jon is still off of soylent and is graduating to something a bit harsher:  dystopian prison food corn chowder! And Joel continues to love and hate all films at the same time.

But let's get to the main event, the defining chapter in a twenty-hour adventure, and maybe the last we'll see of the Tolkien-iverse for quite a while: our review of 'The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies'. And if you aren't satisfied with two-and-a-half hours of battle scenes and Hobbit themes, then SURPRISE, there is an EXTENDED CUT of this very episode! In it, Jon talks down the new 'Annie' film, Joel details the entire soundtrack for 'TH:TBotFA', Jon forgets who scored the Star Wars films, and the words "Hobbit" and "porno" are used in the same sentence. IT'S A MADHOUSE! Check out the the extended cut in our shownotes, and let the boys know what you think. Enjoy!

"It's so defining!"

<meta_aside>SPOILERS ABOUND</meta_aside>

Theatrical Cut (2:29):

Extended Cut (2:54):

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Topics this week include:
- 'The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies'.
- "Technomonking" and monasticism.
- sarcasm marks.
- Sawny and 'The Intervwa'.
- Riddles in the Dark
- Joel's PBotW: 'Shazam!', 'Pride of Bagdad'.

Essential Quotations:
- "I think you have something in your throat, Jon." "It's just a single tear, Joel."
- "Welcome to the Modern Age!" "Thank you."

- Joel fails at tomatillo salsa.
- Jon admits to being a bad nerd.
- It was Herbert Hoover, not FDR.
- 'Return of the King' totally won the Adapted Screenplay Oscar in 2004.